Monday, July 4, 2011

2nd 30 Day Letter Challenge--Day 18: Letter to a Disney Character

Dear Princesses/Heroines,

I have had bones to pick with you before about all the impossible notions of love you gave me and how angry I was at you because I would never find anything like that in the real world and you ruined the concept for me. You ran around all happy and free once you'd found your respective princes and made me feel like that level of carefreeness was unattainable. And then I found something that was a temporary real-life equivalent. Temporary being the key word there. And I've realized I have a whole new bone to pick with you: none of you ever taught me how to say that this attempt at finding love has failed and it is time to move on with my life.

Let me show you what I mean:

  • Ariel, I will start with you because you know you're my favorite. Your love interest was of a different species than you. I don't even want to think about how you were possibly sexually compatible. He also lived in a world you couldn't visit by being yourself, nor could you ever bring him down to dinner with your parents. Your father hated him. You had to sell your voice to a witch to get a doomed chance to be with him. He couldn't tell you were you without your voice--did you ever question what had he really fallen for? You watched him fall under a spell and almost marry someone else. 
  • Belle, you're up next in the bestiality theme. Your prince was actually a monster, and you fell for him anyway--though that might be better known as Stockholm Syndrome. You saw his true colors or some shit, Idk. He was really just a big fluffy ol' teddy bear. Whatever. He also held you prisoner and was entirely dependent upon you without showing any affection for a very long time, and I'm concerned by your lack of concern about any of this.
  • Sleeping Beauty, just...does the practically necrophilia not bother you at all?
  • Cinderella, you knew him for approximately an hour. Couldn't he have just been a great guy you met, someone to keep in mind for your next lifetime? How could you know he was worth leaving your [albeit terrible] family for? 
  • Nala, he abandoned you and everyone and everything you have ever known because a somewhat scary uncle yelled at him. He was selfish and cared only about himself for years. He didn't even want to help until a crazy monkey called on his dead father's spirit to shake some sense into him. And yet you still expected him to save you and married him and had a kid? Idk how those trust issues were ever ironed out.
  • Mulan, besides sheer sexiness and the ability to be a leader, the only thing your man has going for you is that he left you in the snow on the side of a mountain to die rather than killing you himself...after you saved his life in an act of pure recklessness that I cannot condone. Then, when you manage not only to save yourself, but to SAVE THE ENTIRE REPUBLIC OF CHINA, he tries to apologize for your actions to the emperor rather than let you accept your praise. And then when he shows up at your parents' house it's like none of that ever happened?
  • Jasmine, okay, so he saved you from having your hand chopped off in the marketplace and you guys had a moment in his hovel. Don't forget that he then thought you were too shallow to ever accept him for who he was so pretended to be a pompous asshole prince to win you like real love was supposed to be a game. He then inadvertently gives power to your father's evil vizier and nearly gets your entire city destroyed. Sure in an act of wit and deception he fixes it all in the end, but...who did he think you were and how did you let him get away with it?
  • Meg, your job was to find a way to kill him and instead you almost killed yourself for him. Some wires got crossed somewhere. And let's not forget that you sold your soul to Hades himself to get your first love out of some trouble and then he ran off with some bimbo.
  • Pocahontas, he came here ignorant as fuck and hell-bent on destroying your land and livelihood. So of course, the obvious thing to do is try to teach him what he doesn't know and then throw yourself onto the chopping block to stop your father from killing him.
 I think you get my point, ladies. I'm not so sure I should be jealous of these stories anymore. In fact, I think I'm a little worried about emotional abuse and post-traumatic stress disorder. It has been hard for me to admit, as I get older, that you all may not be a girl's best role model, especially once she has become a woman with grown-woman's shit to deal with. I want to know why none of you ever gave up. I feel like I'm supposed to think it's because you're strong women who know what they want, but I'm beginning to think you might have been scared. Or, to paraphrase Jessica Rabbit, you're just written that way. 
 I want to tell you something you may have never heard before, deserve less damaging stories than that. It's not always meant to be. And I'm sorry it's too late for you to take this advice, but I can learn from it too, so here goes: don't be afraid to let a love go and try again with someone new and interesting when he comes along. Be free. Be a bad-ass independent woman. Find someone who can show you new worlds and make you feel like a Queen and give you heartfelt gifts and maybe even take a crazy risk or two for you, yes, but also find someone you can be real with and who is real with you. Someone who doesn't need changing or require that you give up some great part of yourself. Find a story that is comfortable and easy and won't make anyone cringe along the way. You're the only person you need to give a third chance (seconds are more flexible). Find someone who respects you and your background and gives you some freedom. And remember that only a man that gives you the best of himself deserves the best of you.

I still love you though, and I hope you're happy in whatever-after you ended up in.


Reblogged from Sociological Images

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